Home > Uncategorized > Edwards vs. Baby Momma Drama, Georgia vs. Russia, China vs. the World, Fitch vs. St. Pierre

Edwards vs. Baby Momma Drama, Georgia vs. Russia, China vs. the World, Fitch vs. St. Pierre

I suppose I could rant about the fact that the extra-marital affair of a two-time Democratic Primary loser is trumping a freaking war breaking out, but I guess I understand. I mean, a good looking, smooth-talking Southern lawyer cheats on his wife? Truly shocking and something I’d never expect.

Or I could write about the mixed feelings I have about the Olympics. I could pine on our collective discomfort with China being allowed to host a Games whose goals and aspirations seem in direct conflict with the Chinese government’s policies, which are riddled with human rights violations and the open practice of social and political oppression. Then I could wonder, out loud, if perhaps the Olympics being there works against the government’s goals in that it actually presents the opportunity for outside forces to open the eyes of some of the people or at the very least plant the seeds for change.

However, these are the sort of things that depress me, and I won’t pretend to be more qualified to speak on such matters when others have provided far more eloquent and interesting observations. Instead, I’ll do what I do best…talk about Mixed Martial Arts.

(Saturday 8/9/08 10:00pm EST from the Target Center in Minneapolis, MN )

The show will be aired live at the Palace of Wisdom (my apartment) – reply, IM, or e-mail if you’re interested in stopping by. Unless you’re a complete stranger, in which case no, because that’s just weird.

The “sub-title” (if you will) for this pay-per-view is “Seek and Destroy.” Perhaps that refers to Jon Fitch’s desire to seek out and destroy Georges St. Pierre, or vice-versa. Or it could be in reference to Quinton Jackson’s infamous joyride. However, the most likely reason is that UFC just needs to come up with an aggressive name for every show, and any one they can think up that doesn’t sound too forced or corny works for them.

The card:

(bouts which will not be televised but could make air if fights go short and/or a spectacular knockout or submission occurs):
WELTERWEIGHT BOUT: Ben Saunders (5-0-2) vs. Ryan Thomas (9-1-0)
WELTERWEIGHT BOUT: Steve Bruno (12-3-0) vs. Chris Wilson (12-5-1)
LIGHT HEAVYWEIGHT BOUT: Andre Gusmao (5-0-0) vs. Jon Jones (6-0-0)
* Geez. DC Comics kills off Martian Manhunter, and three months later he’s already back as a UFC fighter. Do super-heroes EVER stay dead?! If you get that joke, you’re a big goddamn loser. Like me! Let’s be friends.
HEAVYWEIGHT BOUT: Cheick Kongo (21-5-1) vs. Dan Evensen (244)
* In Kongo’s last fight, which the UFC made clear was for the #1 Contendership for Nogueira’s Heavyweight Championship, he lost to Heath Herring. But that was before Frank Mir agreed to coach the next season of “The Ultimate Fighter” on Spike, which I guess is all you need to get a title shot. So Kongo’s last fight, he was considered in line for a Heavyweight Title Shot if he won. Now he’s knocked all the way to the pre-show undercard? That’s a bit bullshitty, especially since the guy has shown a lot of improvement over the last year.
WELTERWEIGHT BOUT: Luke Cummo (9-6-0) vs. Tamden McCrory (10-1-0)
* Listeners of “Living Under Marshall Law” know that Luke Cummo is one of mine and co-host Brian P. Dermody’s (bpdermody) favorite fighters to talk about. Why? Because, true story, he drinks his own pee. It has vital nutrients, you see, and blah blah blah bullshit pseudo-science. I know what you’re thinking. “Drinking your own pee? That’s crazy no matter what sort of reasoning he gives.” Well, you’re right. Luke Cummo’s fucking nuts. Unfortunately he’s not “oh my God I wouldn’t want to fight this guy” crazy, but the kind of crazy you don’t want chatting you up in the grocery store because it gets awkward quickly.


MIDDLEWEIGHT BOUT: Demian Maia (8-0-0) vs. Jason MacDonald (21-9-0)
Demian Maia’s got a semi-impressive resume, with all but one of his fights being finished in the first or second round. He faces Jason MacDonald, nicknamed “The Athlete.” Usually a nickname like that denotes a severe lack of personality, though he’s actually not bad to watch. He’s the sort of fighter who has enough respect where a win against could mean something if you’re at a crossroads at 185, but he can never seem to break that upper echelon of the weight division. With Maia being a question mark and not having faced any names at 185, this is really a Battle of Who Could Care Less.
Prediction: Demian Maia (2nd Round; Submission)

LIGHTWEIGHT BOUT: Manvel Gamburyan (8-2-0) vs. Robert Emerson (7-6-0)
Manny Gamburyan’s an explosive little shit, and can be a lot of fun to watch. His only two losses were unfortunate, with a loss to Sean Sherk when Sherk was still dominant and a loss to Nate Diaz after he injured himself shooting in on him in the Ultimate Fighter 5 finale. Unfortunately, in his last fight he committed a huge MMA faux pas by taking a cheapshot at Jeffrey Cox when they touched gloves, which I feel shouldn’t be rewarded with a spot on a pay-per-view telecast. Especially since he’s fighting Rob Emerson, a one-dimensional mediocre kickboxer who is simply not a UFC caliber fighter.
Prediction: Manny Gamburyan (1st Round; Submission)

LIGHTWEIGHT BOUT: Kenny Florian (9-3-0) vs. Roger Huerta (22-1-1)
Ohhhhhh man, I cannot wait for this fight. These two are legit Top 10 Lightweights, and the winner has to be considered the #1 Contender at 155. When the winner will actually get a shot at Lightweight Champion BJ Penn is anyone’s guess, since BJ is focused on eating cheeseburgers so he can lose again to Georges St. Pierre at 170. It doesn’t help that Penn’s at a point in his career where he’ll realistically only fight name opponents, since he feels like he’s solidified himself as the best at 155 even though the UFC has plenty of challengers at 155 and Penn has only beaten a past-his-prime (and outsized) Jens Pulver, an overrated Lightweight from The Ultimate Fighter, and Sherk when Sherk was off the juice. Okay, okay, I hate BJ Penn and it’s only somewhat justifiable. Anyway, fights like this are why I love the Lightweights in the UFC. I’ll be shocked if anything but this is fight of the night
Prediction: Huerta (Split Decision)

HEAVYWEIGHT BOUT: Brock Lesnar (1-1-0) vs. Heath Herring (29-13-1)
Lesnar’s opponent was originally supposed to be Mark Coleman, but Coleman got injured because he’s really fucking old. It’s odd that the UFC would have even done a freakshow fight like that in the first place, since they always chastise other promotions for doing that sort of thing. So instead of Old Man Coleman, Lesnar gets another trial by fire against #1 Heavyweight contender Heath Herring. Herring’s experience and return to form would seem to have Lesnar completely outmatched. However, Lesnar has two things working for him. For one (and this may sound ridiculous), Lesnar is such a baby in the sport that it’s hard to guage his skill level. His inexperience in MMA was shown when he literally gave Frank Mir his foot for his first submission loss, but Lesnar’s a very fast learner and if he’s worked on his Jiu-Jits defense, then look out. The other thing he has going for him is that he was one of the best NCAA wrestlers of the last twenty years, and Herring has shown a weakness against guys with a strong grappling background.
Prediction: For the sake of controversy…Lesnar (3rd Round; TKO)

WELTERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP BOUT: Georges St. Pierre (16-2-0) vs. Jon Fitch (17-2-0)
A lot of people have jumped onto the Jon Fitch bandwagon in the weeks leading up to this show. Fitch himself has expressed displeasure in so many people overlooking him, and he has a point. With impressive wins over the likes of Diego Sanchez and the longest winning streak in UFC history (8 fights; tied with Royce Gracie), he’s certainly not just some dude being unmercifully fed to one of the best pound-for-pound fighters in the world. And for my money, you’ll only find two Welterweights in North America better than Fitch. One of them is Jake Shields. The other, unfortunately, is Georges St. Pierre. Let me first say this – I think Fitch has a chance in this fight. However, anybody who thinks that Fitch has anything in his game that St. Pierre doesn’t have an answer for is either fooling themselves or simply hasn’t been paying attention. While I wouldn’t say St. Pierre is at the level of Anderson Silva or Fedor Emelianenko is, he’s still a higher class of fighter than any Welterweight you’ll come across. We’re talking about the guy who fought Josh Koscheck, considered by many to be one of the best pure wrestlers in the UFC (if not THE best), and decided to dominate him with wrestling just because he can. Yes, we all remember St. Pierre being knocked out against Matt Serra, but as much as I like Serra, St. Pierre showed how much of a fluke that was when they met a second time. Thankfully, Fitch has a lot of heart and he’ll give a good fight.
Prediction: St. Pierre (2nd Round; TKO)

Should be a good night.

More later…

  1. August 9, 2008 at 6:34 am

    You forgot “Anderson Cooper vs. Living Lohan.”

    • August 9, 2008 at 6:45 am

      But see, that IS notable and newsworthy. Because we were talking about it and you were all like “ha haaaaa, he’s so gay and doesn’t even care anymore” and I was like “OMG TOTLY”.

      Then there was this break in the conversation and I realized “holy shit, I talk about the same shows in the same exact manner.”

      It’s a good thing I like certain body parts so much, otherwise I’d be going through a real crisis here that would need to be addressed in the CNN Situation Room.

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