Home > Uncategorized > Other thoughts on the Super Bowl

Other thoughts on the Super Bowl

I just logged into G-Mail to see the following headline:
Britney’s custody hearing continued (AP)

And you know, I immediately assumed that there was now a battle for custody of Britney, i.e. who gets to take care of her crazy ass. And I was genuinely surprised that it was about her kids. Does that say more about how far she’s fallen or how stupid I am? YOU MAKE THE CALL!

Also, two other quick notes from last night:

1. The Giants have had the same Athletic Trainer since 1948. They showed him on the sidelines. Myself and a guy named Jim who also attended the festivities at Chateau de Howe had way too much fun making fun of Old Man Athlete giving helpful hints such as “take some Metamucil…it’ll help you poop!” and “Michael Strahan, these pills will make you remember better” and using shuffleboard as their cardio workout. HAAAA HAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAA old people.

2. JOE. BUCK. Oh my God. Seriously, it’s bad enough that any Fox coverage of baseball subjects us to his idiocy, but do we really have to suffer him for their NFL coverage as well? I’m really glad there was good conversation in the room last night, because on the few occassions I could hear the commentary half the time I wanted to put my foot through the television. In fact, if watching alone, I’d probably pull an Elvis and blow it out with a magnum. The apex of his ineptness (which was matched only by the ineptness of New England on both sides of the ball and the sidelines) came when there were two seconds left on the clock, and he says “word from the NFL is that they have to play the down to end the game!” As if the NFL had to fucking meet to decide this. No, this is not just official word coming from the NFL, this is the fucking RULES OF THE GAME THAT ANYBODY WHO EVER WATCHED MORE THAN TWO GAMES OF FOOTBALL KNOWS. I hate Joe Buck. I hate him so much.

3. Speaking of Fox coverage, Pam Oliver’s big scoop of the evening: The Giants had crates of bananas delivered to the site of the game.

4. Speaking of the site of the game (wow, if I knew the transitions would be this easy I wouldn’t have bothered with a numbered list!), it didn’t occur to me until somebody pointed it out last night that the University of Phoenix stadium is actually for THE University of Phoenix Online. You know, the one you see all the commercials for. And no, you’re not mistaken, there is no real University of Phoenix campus (various office locations at learning centers scattered throughout the United States don’t count even if they want me to count them). However, I came up with a great idea – have them get eligibility in the NCAA and get their own football team. But instead of physically playing the game, they challenge other schools to games of Madden.

Oh shit, I’m still at work. Bye!

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  1. February 4, 2008 at 10:37 pm

    #3: Oh god, I’m glad I didn’t imagine that. I laughed so hard and sent someone a text message about it that said something like, “I know it’s for potassium for cramps, but ‘Somebody just rushed in a crate of bananas’ is a hilarious sentence.'” And then they cut to a shot of some bananas! Hilarity.

    • February 5, 2008 at 10:44 pm

      It’s more like something you think you’d hear in a live news report on Sesame Street.

      “And now, with a special report from the Zoo, here’s Kermit the Frog”

  2. February 5, 2008 at 2:35 am

    Oh. My. God. The BANANAS!

    • February 5, 2008 at 10:43 pm

      Dare I say, that shit was bananas (spelled B-A-N-A-N-A-S)

  3. February 5, 2008 at 5:32 am

    FUCKIN’ GEORGE JONES!!!

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